When it comes to social networking, Facebook needs no introduction! More than 10 billion status updates! Does that figure surprise you? Not me! Of course, more than 10 billion… much much more! After all, Facebook statuses can range from quotes to life lessons, to movie reviews, to whatever hell you are up to in whichever part of the world. Ugghh… do I look like am sick of these? Then lemme tell you a trade secret… I’ve spent quite an unhealthy (read huge) time, on reading Facebook statuses.
And so, here are the hidden meanings behind some of the statuses. Remember, “everything is never as it seems”!
Status no. 1
I love my bf so much! He is just the best thing that ever happened to me. You make me feel like the luckiest girl baby. Lubbb yu. Muah!
Translation: Get jealous people. I want you to think my boyfriend is the best, even if he is a moron and I’ll kill him if he didn’t like this status of mine! Also, I am dumb, and I don’t know how to spell!
Status no. 2
I mmmmm ssooooooooo DRRRUUUNNK right now! Lol!
Translation: I had two shots of vodka! And I want you to know that am drunk, which you might have ignored if I hadn’t written it in CAPS! Gotcha!
Status no. 3
Yay! It’s my birthday tomorrow!
Translation: Please wish me tomorrow. Your wishes are responsible for validating my existence. Puuuhhhlllleeeeez!
Status no. 4
Uggghh! I hate my life! Why does it happen with me, always!
Translation: Attention! I crave for it!
Status no. 5
If you believe in god/ Allah/ Jesus/ Sunny Leone/ monster/alien.. blah blah blah.. you are wrong and I am right!
Translation: I want argument baby! Got nothing better to do today. Come on! Gimme more, bitch!
Status no. 6
Putting up famous quotes as status.
Translation: I am a brainy guy/ girl! Period!
Status no. 7
Putting up a copy paste status.
Translation: I know you’ve seen this a hundred times on the internet, but I think you must see it one more time. Also, I’ve got the imagination of a dead rock, if rocks could actually die!
Status no. 8
In life………………………….other people……….learn…………………be happy……………………….care……………………………..god is there… blah blah blah!
Translation: Philosophy dude! Here’s a mature person sitting right in front of the screen and updating status, coz that’s just what mature people do!
Status no. 9
Am sick of caring too much……blah blah…. live my life…independent strong.!
Translation: I got dumped! And this is how I am gonna relieve my frustration. Deal with it!
Status no. 10
I AM SO SICK OF ALL THE DRAMA!
Translation: Not at all! I love drama. Gimme more… maybe that can fix my caps lock!
Status no. 11
Putting up lyrics of a song as status.
Translation: Nothing! I was just humming the song and the genius idea struck me, that the lyrics make a great recipe for facebook likes! He he!
Status no. 12
The countdown has begun…. so excited! Yippie!
Translation: Keep guessing. I like to keep my things mysterious. Also I have a more interesting life, coz am …umm… you know… excited!
Status no. 13
That mean bitch…blah blah…never a good friend….don’t trust……….go die!
Translation: Confronting the bitch I have trouble with is not my style, so am gonna publicly broadcast my problems to people who don’t know about the problem, and who don’t give a damn about the problem. Coz am just that cool!
Status no. 14
Check out this video I made and like it on YouTube. Here’s the link http://www.coolguyramavatarsingh.//yoyohoneysinghrap.-0hjdhjkuy8.
Translation: You’ll hate yourself for the rest of your life, if you click on this link!
Status no. 15
Eating pizza! <3 <3 <3 <3
Translation: Care about my dietary issues! Also, I know how to make hearts… woooo hooo!